Pirates Reds Wildcard Game: 10 Things I Dont Want To See

The Pittsburgh Pirates host a Major League Baseball Postseason Game tonight.  Oh yes, it’s true.  It’s here.  The torture known as postseason play has returned to Pittsburgh.  But as much as we look forward to seeing the game tonight, we have a few things we absolutely don’t want to see.

First off would be very obvious.  I don’t want to see Ardolis Chapman.  No thanks.   Dusty Baker isn’t going to use Ardolis Chapman unless they have a lead.  It only makes sense.  God I hope he is only that foolish.

Anyone in red.

A Marty Brennaman sighting would mean a celebration of some sort is happening on the PNC Park grass.

Johnny Cueto‘s changeup is trailer park filthy.  I really hope he doesn’t have it tonight.

Billy Hamilton on the basepaths  Such a pest can mean game changing like things are going on.

A Brandon Phillips bat flip.  Oh, that might be the worst of the list.

Dusty’s smiling face with the toothpick dangling.

Clint Barmes.  If only I could make out the lineup card, I start Jordy tonight.  I think I love Jordy.  Bring Barmes in late if you must.  We just have the feeling that some runs are going to need to be scored tonight, Mercer provides offense.  He’s seeing the ball well.  It’s Mercer Time.

Pittsburgh Pirates players bunting that are not good at bunting.  In other words the only player that should bunt for the Buccos should be Gerrit Cole.

Any sembelance of sadness in the stands.  Even if the Bucs get down early, the fans must maintain the energy and I have confidence that they will.  It’s been too damn long, the stories of the failures of the past 20 years have grown stale.  We all know them, we don’t need anymore pain.  Tonight needs to be a celebration throughout all (hopefully only) nine innings.

The magic continues tonight Pittsburgh.  I am dying to see it, but don’t want to see anything we just wrote.  How bout you?