Dear Mr. Carlos Beltran,


We greatly appreciate your comments directed toward the Pittsburgh Pirates.  As lifelong Pirate fans, we entirely understand your comments.  Our club has been rather bad over the years.  We are used to being pretty frustrated ourselves with the production of the team.  But this comment was a little over the top:

“The reality of this is coming here to Pittsburgh and getting swept, me, I feel embarrassed,” Beltran said after the Mets’ 11-6 loss this afternoon at PNC Park. “I mean, we have to take this personally. It can’t happen. It can’t happen, us being able to come here and lose three games just like that. Three games to this team. I know they’re a big-league ball club, but we’re better than them. We’re better than them. And we know we’re better than them, but we have to do something about it.”

You are an outstanding citizen and when you make a comment that is directly related at our ball club, you catch our attention.  Pittsburgh is a proud city.

We would like you to know that we have the utmost respect for you off the baseball field.  What you have done with opening your $10 million dollar Carlos Beltran Baseball Academy exhibits your true commitment to your country.  It will help many kids.  For that, you are to be commended.   We found it disappointing that it didn’t make more headlines.  The Pirates opened a similar facility, but it doesn’t seem as nice as yours.  Yours is probably the better facility, just like the Mets are, as you put it, the better team.

Your fast start this season was perhaps the best offensive start in baseball when you came out hitting .374 with 6 HR and 25 RBI by Mother’s Day.  You haven’t slipped much and are still holding strong nearly a month later and after the Pirates knocked your  teams asses around, your still hitting .356 with 7HR and 32 RBI now.  Your OPS is sick, as it always is, at 1.022.   Hell, we don’t think its dropped below .850 for a long time, except for that one year huh?  We won’t talk about that.  We also won’t talk about your lack of a championship ring.

But (you knew it was coming) this comment you made about our ballclub will stick with us for a long time.  We know we aren’t that good.  We were just better than your team for these three games.

We anticipate that you are unquestionably angry with your team, your management, and even yourself.  Nah…, your probably not mad at yourself.  Because if you cared THAT much you would have played more than one game in this series.  But we know you had a bellyache.  Hell, there were a lot of bellyaches.  Only four starters were in the lineup for your team?  They needed you.

Team leaders don’t play with bellyaches, do they?   Team leaders that cash monster paychecks like yours surely aren’t expected to suck it up on road trips are they?  Team leaders simply write checks with their mouth and then expect their teammates to cash those checks for them right?

So go ahead and go back to motivating your Mets teammates today.  You have some work to do alongside Sheffield and Delgado and PerezReyes, Church, Pora, Martinez, Maine and Pagan all seem to be bellyached this year.  Hell, you have Emil Brown on the roster to motivate now.  We feel for you Mr. Beltran.  We really do.   Is Perez making more than you are?  You are really the better player.  You know that though…

Also, as a friendly reminder, don’t forget to motivate that outstanding bullpen that your team has purchased.

You know what though Mr. Beltran?  You are playing the Nationals in this next series….and you are the better team.  So you will no doubt sweep that series.  If you have some time, or another bellyache, I hear they have some great musuems in DC.  The Mets won’t need your leadership on the field, just tell the Washington Times that ‘the Mets are the better team quote.’  Then I think you deserve to go and explore the term leadership at the Smithsonian.  I am certain you can find some other leaders that were great at motivating through the fine art of public speaking.

In Houston this weekend, the Pirates will stick with our new dynamic leader.  You probably saw him yesterday.

His name is Andrew McCutchen.  Some fans call him Andrew McAwesomeER. 

He got up at o dark thirty yesterday to catch a 5am flight.  A flight that had to make a connection through Cleveland. His ‘call to the bigs’ was a pretty big deal to the fans of Pittsburgh yesterday as 3,300 fans thought enough to come to the walk up window at PNC Park  to watch his professional debut.  And a few said he should have just ran to Pittsburgh, the hell with all this air travel.  He is pretty fast isn’t he Mr Beltran?

Do you think he will be as good as you are one day?  Probably not, huh?  You were probably remembering when you came up with the Royals back in ’98.  How old were you, like 21?  Did you say moronic things back then too?  Or is this a habit you have learned as you have put together productive season after productive season in the major leagues?

You probably saw the Pirates other speedster too.  Nyjer Morgan.  Those two combined to go 4 for 8 with five runs and two RBI yesterday.  That had to sting a little for you, huh?

And that other comment, the one where you said, “McLouth wasn’t there, and they still come out and score how many runs, 11? Eleven runs. We have to play better.”  We read that too.

Yeh Nate McLouth is gone.  And it does hurt a little.  But it was a ballsy deal that the team needed to make.  Our pitching is pretty bad throughout the  organization.  You know about bad pitching though don’t you, Mr. Beltran?  We apologize for the lack of focus from your pitching staff.  We trust this series isn’t an indication that your team can’t win the games they ‘should’ win.

And we are also sorry for pounding JJ Putz so hard that his elbow hurts today.  Poor fella. 

We also sincerely apologize for hitting Mike Pelfrey so hard that he didn’t even go see the Penguins game last night.  [Mets website]He said it would have been, ”sending the wrong message.”  You should tell Pelfrey you got the sending the wrong message part covered.  He should have went to the Igloo, the Pens played a hell of a game.

Normally better teams beat the lesser teams.  Well, except in the case of your Mets.  Better teams don’t get swept by teams like the Pirates.  Maybe, you should look in the mirror and figure out how to beat these lesser teams, how to lead your team to actual victory on the field, and not by simply saying the idiotic things that you did after your team is swept.

I know, I know, you probably feel bad because your team spent so much money on what it thought would improve the club and then the Mets come to Pittsburgh and look so awful.  We are certain it was a bit disappointing on that upset stomach.

The Pirates lost some leaders this year as well.  Our catcher, Ryan Doumit has been out.  Our shortstop, Jack Wilson, has missed considerable time.  Even Nate was out for a few games.  But the Pirates aren’t real big on excuses.  We go to work everyday trying to beat the better teams.  It’s been something we have been doing for, well, a long time around Pittsburgh. 

We are certain your teammates are really inspired by your comments.  We would also think the Pirates will be looking forward to your return to PNC Park on July 2nd.  Maybe some of your teammates will be feeling better by then?  Perhaps you can come out and play that day?  Perhaps you will have used your public speaking skills to gain some ground on the Phillies by then?

 Please, whatever you do as the team leader of the New York Mets, don’t you dare take responsibility and tell your team to look in the mirror.  It is simply easier to say you’re the better team.  Hell, keep saying it, maybe it will work for you.  Teams might just lie down for the M-E-T-S from New York town.



P.S.  We trust you won’t be teaching public speaking at the Carlos Beltran Baseball Academy.  Just stick to what you are good at Mr. Beltran hitting the bejesus out of the baseball.  We trust you can make it to 300HR this year, it couldn’t happen to a player with more class.

AP Photo below of McCutchen who was ‘pied’ after the Pirates victory:

AP Photo by Heller

Mr. Beltran and the Mets playing hide and seek.  Carlos counts to 20 while his teammates hide…”ready or not guys, here I come…heh, where did all the starters go?  Who the hell are you guys?”