Mystery Pitcher Enters Astros J.A. Happs Body, Baffles Pirates


The left-hander on the mound last night for the Houston Astros

looked nothing like the pitcher with the worst ERA in Major League Baseball.  J.A. Happ was reportedly the starter for Houston, but we have serious doubts.

The pitcher on the mound last night presumably had a 4-14 mark, a 6.26 ERA and had thrown 119 innings giving up 135 hits and 17 HRs.

So to watch J.A. Happ, or whomever had entered Happ’s body, throw seven innings of shutout, three-hit baseball with six strikeouts against the Pittsburgh Pirates was mesmorizing.  The Astros took the game 2-0 and the swept the series.   It was the fourth time in the past six Pirates trips to Houston, the ballclub has been swept by the Astros.

It wasn’t enough that the Pirates were swept it was how it went down with a pile of whiffs and big inning implosions.   It was a mental beatdown that won’t be easy to bounce back from for today’s one game makeup against the Los Angeles Dodgers.

The only saving grace is the fact that the Pirates will face another left-hander.  This one is named Dana Eveland.  Yeh, you remember him, right?  He’s awful.

Let’s trust this paranormal thing doesn’t continue at PNC Park today.

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