Please Come Back, Pittsburgh Pirates


Well.   You’ve probably listened to everyone give their opinion.  The numbness that has become Pittsburgh Pirates baseball is about all that’s left.  It happened so slowly, but so suddenly at the same time.

We never saw this coming.  Sure they were bad early in the season, but we knew they were underachieving.

Then they were over their head in the heat of the summer.

"“Let’s also be clear that a very important situation has arisen: The White Sox  and the Pirates are in first place. So we may be in the World Series together.  We love each other and we can root for each other until we get to the World  Series. Then it’s every man for himself,” President Obama said amid laughter on July 6"

The Bucs were scoring runs like a Pujols-type juggernaut behind the smoking bat of Andrew McCutchen.

But now, it just feels numb.  We started listening to sad songs last night after hanging out with some friends from Baltimore.  All they talked about was baseball.  How happy they were.  How they are going to games at Camden again.  Yeah, we were happy for them.  Good for them.

They deserve it.  But like a lot of people said on twitter last night –  When does our time come?   Ahh, just play another song.

Johnny Cash sings it pretty well.  “Everyone goes away in the end. You could have it all. My empire of dirt. I will let you down. I will make you hurt.”

The Pirates have won 14 games since July 29. Fourteen!  Soak that in.  Fourteen games.  The Pirates have lost 26 games since July 29.

The Jolly Roger has been raised just nine times in the past 30 games. Nine.

Over those last 30 games the starting rotation has an ERA of 5.21.

The team is batting .235 in those games.  Two. Thirty. Five.

We think Clint Hurdle listens to this song. Damn, this song sucks.

We prefer this song, actually.

Since August 8, Cutch has three bombs in 120 at-bats and is hitting about .240.  AJ and James McDonald have combined for an ERA over five in the second half of the season.

Where did the Pittsburgh Pirates go?  Everybody’s watching this with an absolute train wreck-like horror on their faces.  Please come back, Bucs.    We miss you guys.